There are just so many problems with diamonds. Perhaps I should list them? Should I list what I view as most important first and so on or from production to purchase to death? Or should I list them reverse alphabetically? So I was really going to write about diamonds but now I'm wondering why there are so many ways, relevant and not, to listing ideas or whatnot. Hmmm. How about whatever order they come to mind in.
A bunch of reasons that Diamonds suck:
- Diamonds cost roughly 2 months salary
- They also cost the lives of innocent miners trying to feed their family
- Diamonds are a pain in the rectum to shop for
- They serve literally no purpose
- Diamonds are like dicks for women, bigger is better but shape still matters
- One cannot easily sell a diamond or regift it
- They are easy to misplace and therefore cause minor heart attacks without need
- Diamonds get caught on random things or scratch people
- They create the impression that women are like small children; look shiny!
Of course marriage and often love requires the gifting of diamonds. The dark under belly of all of this is that women end up with a small box of jewelry that they cannot wear anymore because it was a gift from a past lover; they cannot sell it because parting with a necklace that symbolizes your life with someone for 3 years for $75 just doesn't seem right.
After three years of hiding a promise ring at a friend's house and keeping it tucked away in a box inside a box in my bedroom I finally found a person that I could reasonably give the ring to. After I gave this ring away for good it seemed like a burden was lifted from my shoulders and I could finally put so many things in the past where they belong. Other pieces of jewelry have not come to such an end yet and I have no idea how or when that may even happen.
All of the above still being true, I want more shiny jewelry. Now.
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